You have the right, without shame, blame or guilt:

In all intimate relationships:

— to be free from coercion, violence and intimidation,

— to choose the level of involvement and intimacy you want,

— to revoke consent to any form of intimacy at any time,

— to be told the truth,

— to say no to requests,

— to hold and express differing points of view,

— to feel all your emotions,

— to feel and communicate your emotions and needs,

— to set boundaries concerning your privacy needs,

— to set clear limits on the obligations you will make,

— to seek balance between what you give to the relationship and what is given back to you,

— to know that your partner will work with you to resolve problems that arise,

— to choose whether you want a monogamous or polyamorous relationship,

— to grow and change,

— to make mistakes,

— to end a relationship.

In poly relationships:

— to decide how many partners you want,

— to choose your own partners,

— to have an equal say with each of your partners in deciding the form your relationship with that partner will take,

— to choose the level of time and investment you will offer to each partner,

— to understand clearly any rules that will apply to your relationship before entering into it,

— to discuss with your partners decisions that affect you,

— to have time alone with each of your partners,

— to enjoy passion and special moments with each of your partners.

In a poly network:

— to choose the level of involvement and intimacy you want with your partners’ other partners,

— to be treated with courtesy,

— to seek compromise,

— to have relationships with people, not with relationships,

— to have plans made with your partner be respected; for instance, not changed at the last minute for trivial reasons,

— to be treated as a peer of every other person, not as a subordinate.

These two key axioms to support ethical decisions in relationships root in considerations of basic human rights:
— The people in the relationship are more important than the relationship.
— Don’t treat people as things.