Don’t you understand that all this rigmarole of flattery and chivalry — the whole theatrical that men perform for women — is disrespect? Any lie is disrespect, and a relationship based on that nonsense is a lie. Chivalry is a fiction invented by men who don’t want to be bothered with taking women seriously. The minute a man and woman assent to it they stop thinking of each other as individual human beings: they assent to it precisely so they won’t have to think about their partners. Which is completely useful, of course, if sex is the only thing that’s on your mind.