Amy Gahran, “Stepping Off the Relationship Escalator: Uncommon Love and Life”

Relationship Anarchy

Some people don’t find it useful to sort their relationships into categories. Rather, they prefer to focus on the unique, emerging and evolving nature of their connection with each person who matters to them. They treat each relationship as a special case, with its own intrinsic value. And they consciously and explicitly collaborate to design how each relationship works.

There’s a relatively new and not-yet-commonplace term for this ultimate do-it-yourself approach to relationships: relationship anarchy.

More a philosophy than a specific relationship style, relationship anarchists do not gauge the importance of a relationship based on whether it involves sex, romance, life entwinement, or ties of blood or marriage. Rather, they prize autonomy, accept that people are in constant flux, and believe in negotiating and adapting relationships to suit the people in them.